Your Next Choice Matters: What Successful People Ask Before They Move
Success in anything often comes down to one simple question:
Will the choice I’m about to make take me closer to, or farther away from, what I say I want?
That’s it.
Every choice we make takes us in a direction. Over time, those choices begin to shape our lives.
Sometimes the choices that pull us away don’t look destructive in the moment. They’re just easier, faster, more comfortable, or more immediately satisfying.
But our choices still matter. Not because one imperfect choice ruins everything, but because repeated choices become patterns. And patterns become results.
Real Decisions Cut Everything Else Off
Most choices aren’t actually decisions. They’re preferences. The word decide comes from a Latin root which means “to cut off.”
A real decision says:
This is the path I’m taking, and I’m no longer willing to choose options that pull me off track.
That sounds intense, but it’s very freeing. A real decision reduces the mental tug-of-war. It stops you from renegotiating with yourself over and over again.
Look at the difference:
You may prefer to be healthier, but a real decision stops you from bargaining with the habits that drain your energy.
You may prefer to grow your career, but a real decision helps you reach out to those who can help, become more visible, and accept the risks that growth requires.
A preference leaves every door open. A decision closes every door except the one that leads you to what you truly want.
This doesn’t mean you become rigid, harsh, or joyless. In fact, the more honest you are, acting with clear intention and alignment with what truly matters, the happier you become even when things temporarily stall.
Because you’ve got direction.
Ready to become more in charge of your choices? Begin here:
1. Be Specific
Vague goals are easy to abandon because they give you too much room to negotiate.
“I want a better life for my family” can stay vague for years.
“I want to save $300 a month, protect one night a week for family time, or apply for two better opportunities this month” gives you a clear choice.
Specific goals create specific choices. They also clarify what we’re truly willing to work for. It’s easy to say we want something in theory. It’s harder, and much more revealing, to name the actual choices that goal will require.
2. Ask the Question
With a clear, meaningful goal, review each choice by this standard:
Will this take me closer or farther?
This gives you an uncomplicated, no-drama, and powerful opportunity to pause and choose your direction rather than being pulled by habit, emotion, or convenience.
It will also shine a light on your excuses, distractions, and old stories. But noticing them is not the same as judging yourself for them. It’s simply how you begin to change.
3. Check Yourself With Kindness
At regular intervals, look at your progress with an honest but compassionate eye.
Ask yourself:
How consistent have I been in my choices? Where can I improve?
This isn’t about beating yourself up. It’s about telling yourself the truth in a way that helps you move forward.
Success happens in a series of ordinary moments when you remember what you truly want and choose the next right step. Sometimes you will choose closer and sometimes you won’t.
Every moment then becomes a chance to celebrate your choices or to choose again.
Remember to choose what takes you closer. As often as possible.
Jo-Aynne
Thanks to all who reached out last week about my personalized 90-minute coaching, From Default to Direction. If you're ready to turn something around in your career or life, I have a few openings available. Learn more here. 👇
Jo-Aynne Von Born, Leadership/Executive Coach
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